AI OVERVIEW: transcript: talk this morning about the about the image of God, the image of our father, how powerful it is. The image of a father in this fallen world is so powerful. And also the glory of being a child of God. It's amazing. And I'm going to try to do that in 20 minutes. So if I go a little long, I'll try to do better in my next job. But it's it the being a father is one of the most impactful things on the planet. Everyone here has been impacted in some way by fatherhood. Whether you were had a father that was in the home or not, the power of that fatherness is still there. You know, when you think about God, we have a trinity. You know, we have the father, the son, and the holy spirit. One of the three persons of the trinity is father. And when you first thought of the father, you know, father god, you know, what was that image? You know, for me it was, you know, it was somebody on a big throne, you know, powerful, a judge, somebody who sent the son and sent the spirit. And it's, you know, somebody of great mercy and grace, but still very kind of intimidated or intimidating until I got to know him. And then it was somebody that I would just surrender 100% for and just to be in his presence because of his great love. Right? There's no neutrality when we think about fathers. And as we come to Father's Day, you know, Father's Day can be a day of great joy for many people, but it can also also be a day of great anxiety, right? Mixed emotions that people have depending on how the image of a father played out in your life, you know, based on your real father, your family situation. There's so much feelings associated with father. So, as we read our text, and I I want to thank the worship team for preparing our hearts so well this morning with our worship to receive this this text. It says, "Sing to God. Sing in praise of his name. Extol him who rides on the clouds. Rejoice before him. His name is the Lord. A father to the fatherless. A defender of widows is God in his holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families. and he leads out the prisoners with singing. The Bible is full of father images. Probably the most famous model of a father that most people know is the prodigal son. The father in that parable that Jesus told the prodigal father or the prodigal son's father. You remember the story where the son wanted his inheritance right away. He didn't even want to wait till his father died. He went and said to the father, I want my inheritance now and I want to leave. And essentially he said, I want to leave. I want to live as if you don't even exist. I want to take your the money that you going to give me when you die and I want to go out and I want to live my life. So the father probably with a heavy broken heart grants his son his request. He gives him the money. The son goes out, squanders it on uh you know drinking and partying and all that and predictably his life fails completely and then he wants to go back home because nothing was as bad as what he's living now. So he's, you know, thinking up his uh repentant apology on the way home. But his father sees him far off coming home. And he runs out to greet his son, not to have him uh rub it in his face that he failed, not to demand an apology, but he hugs his son. He sees that he's disheveled, so he gets him a robe. He puts the family ring on his finger and he fully restores him in that moment before the son has a chance to say anything and he welcomes him back as a son. Beautiful story. That's the heart of our father. And God teaches us in the scriptures, how do we be a good father? How do we how do we have that father's heart that he wants us to live out with our children? And I I think I observed six healthy marks of a father. And you might have more, but this is just what I I kind of came up with. You know, what does a healthy father look like? And I have six things that six things that we can recognize in a healthy father. First, a healthy father is present and engaged. Healthy fathers actively cultivate a home where their children thrive, providing emotional support, truth, security, and discipline. Presence communicates, "You matter enough to have my full attention." These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. From Deuteronomy 6:6. Fathers are engaged in their kids. Fathers mentor their children. Fathers teach them the Lord's word. Right? Fathers aren't distant. Fathers are present. Fathering happens in ordinary moments at the dinner table, in the car, and at bedtime. Presence is the platform of fatherhood. Secondly, a father speaks words of life and identity. Fathers say I love you. When I was growing up, parents rarely said I love you. Fathers rarely said those words because fathers were supposed to be strong, not mushy, right? Not emotional. But that's not really a good fatherhood practice. Kids can't assume their parents love them unless they hear it hear it often. Fathers affirm their children's gifts and talents, not just their performance. They call out who their children are, not just what their children do. A father's voice can either make or break. There's no neutrality in fatherhood. Psalm 103 says, "As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him." The words the father speaks become the voice children hear in their head, some for the rest of their lives. and it dictates who they are or who they believe they are. Thirdly, a father's a healthy father provides loving discipline and instruction. Discipline without love is harshness, but love without discipline is neglect. Healthy fathers hold truth and tenderness together, correcting not to punish, but to shape character. Healthy fathers hold truth and tenderness together. Correcting I'm sorry. Fathers do not provoke your children to ant to anger but bring them up in the discipline of the Lord. From Ephesians 4. Train up a child in the way he should go and even when he is old he will come back to it. From Proverbs 22. No discipline discipline seems pleasant at the time but painful later on. However, it produces a har a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Have you ever seen a child that never experienced discipline from their parents? >> Yes, we've all seen it because when you see it, it's obvious, right? Especially in stores, in church congregations, right? Everywhere you can tell. And you know, sometimes we think it's loving not to discipline a child, right? But it's the opposite. You know, children need correction, but the correction must be gentle and from a heart of love, not from a heart of anger. Number four, a healthy father models integrity. A father does what a father does in private, his children will do in public. Perhaps you've learned that, too, if you're a father, right? If you use bad words at home, your kids will use them at school. They'll use them everywhere, right? Don't test that because it's universal. And everyone experiences that. What you do in private, your kids will do in public. Children don't need a perfect father. They just need a faithful one. As for me, in my house, said Joshua, we will serve the Lord. from Joshua 24:15. If you have godly habits at home, in private, your kids will practice godly habits in public. Integ integrity also means admitting when you're wrong. It's being transparent. Model repentance at home, not just righteousness. Live an honorable life worthy to imitate. Be imitators of me, Paul writes, as I am of Christ from 1 Corinthians 11:1. A father's life is always a sermon. The only question is, what are you preaching to your kids? Number five, a healthy father gives identity and direction. Healthy fathers help their children understand who they are in Christ and where they're going. They give their children a mission, not just a name. When children know their identity, they don't search for it in dangerous places. For you know that we dealt with you with each of you as a father deals with his own children, encouraging, comforting, and urging you to live worth lives worthy of God who calls you into his kingdom of glory. From 1 Thessal Thessalonians 2 11 and 12. Paul acted as a spiritual father to the Thessalonians. Encouraging, comforting, and urging. These are verbs of a healthy father. This is what we try to do here at Grace Capitol Church with one another. Encourage each other. That includes our kids. We need to be encouraging models to all the kids in our church. Paul says, "I have no greater joy," I'm sorry. John says, "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth." God is pleased when we teach our kids truth and walk in it as a model for them. A healthy father gives children both power and purpose. A healthy father creates a culture of grace in the home. Their home is a place where failure is safe, forgiveness is practiced, and restoration is possible. Their home is a place of safety. The prodigal father's or the prodigal son's father didn't just uh forgive him. He had a party when he returned. Grace at home teaches children what the grace of God looks like and feels like and how it is practiced. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other just as Christ forgave you. From Ephesians 4:32, the home of a healthy father is a preview of the father's house. Healthy fathers don't just provide for their children, they prepare them. They prepare them emotionally, spiritually, relationally, and morally to face the world with confidence, identity, and faith, preparing them to know and recognize our heavenly father when he calls. But, you know, we're fallen. We're we're fallen people in a fallen world. And it would be great if we had perfect fathers. But even the best fathers have fall have flaws and make mistakes. But we don't need perfect fathers. We need faithful fathers. Because there's no perfect father. And all of us have experienced fathers that will eventually disappoint us at some point in large things or small things. But love covers a multitude of sins. When we have fathers that love us sincerely and care for us, even those mistakes, love will cover up. But there are misguided fathers in our world, in our culture. And fatherlessness is not just about an absent father that's not living at home. The impact of fatherlessness is also felt when a father lives at home but is not present or when a father lives at home but doesn't act as a father in the home. Fatherlessness when it's not when a father is not engaged is the very same as if a father is not there. There's another portrait of fathers that we see in the Bible like David, King David. As amazing as a man as David was, a man after God's own heart, David failed as a father. He utterly failed as a father. He was emotionally passive and avoided tough conversations with his kids. And many of you maybe you know the story of David. It's worth reading as a father as you go through first and 2 Samuel first kings chronicles. David had many sons by many women and he left a raising to other people. He had a son named Amnan and a daughter by and a daughter named Tamar. Raised by two different mothers, half brother, half sister. Amnan sexually assaulted his daughter, his sister, his halfsister. Amnan significantly assaulted his sister. And David never addressed it. He never disciplined his son for assaulting his daughter. But Tamar's brother, full brother Abselum went into a rage. Not only because of what Amnan did to his sister, but because their father did nothing to address it. So Abselum took it into his own hands and he murdered his brother over time. Abselum continued in his anger and his father eventually banished him from the kingdom. And his anger and rage continued towards his father because his father would not talk to him at all. So he rebelled against his father. He forced him out of his throne and eventually he was killed during his rebellion. And his father wept. His father his father loved his kids. He just didn't address anything with them. And then his next son, Adonijah, started to do outrageous things to build his own identity, drawing attention to himself. He would get like 50 people as an entourage. And then he got it in his own mind that he would rebel and he would be the next king. That was resolved not by David, but by Solomon and Solomon's mother. David helped, but he wasn't fully engaged. David's silence created generational chaos. Silence wounds as much as words. David confused love for engagement. He loved his children from a distance, but children need more than love. They need presence. David was distracted by calling and success. But outside success doesn't compensate for failure at home. David modeled sin that his sons repeated. David's life was mocked by lust and violence, deception and abuse of power. And children imitate what fathers tolerate. David failed to give identity and direction to his children. His son grew up his sons grew up with power but not purpose. When the father's voice is missing, children search for identity and significance elsewhere. There are tr there are tremendous wounds of fatherlessness all around us in our culture. We see it everywhere. I grew up in a welfare neighborhood. I worked in a prison, was homeless for a time. You can see it all in our culture everywhere. Here are some consequences of fatherlessness in our culture. We have high poverty rates amongst fatherless children, fatherless families. When I was in when I was growing up, probably upwards of 90% of the families in that welfare neighborhood, that uh city project were all fatherless children being raised by their moms. And I can tell you my mom was this high. Did not listen to her. Everything she told me was right, but she couldn't enforce any of it. And that was all the kids in my neighborhood. Low education outcomes. I can tell you that the kids that had fathers, they went to bed early. They went to school. I didn’t finish school. All those kids were dads, they went to school every day. spiritual distortions on the image of God. When you don’t grow up with a father, you don’t have a place of understanding, a a reference point of who God is. Right? God is distant. God is that whoever he is that punishes people. Can't wait to get his hands on you. Right? The image of God among fatherless children is nothing. It's whatever TV says it is. There’s no sense of belonging. This is why gangs, drug dealers are so successful. Because when a father doesn't put that healthy image of who you are on you, those gangs, those drug people, they they are so uh good at accepting you and drawing you in. And the first the first person that I remember being an image of a father for me was a sergeant in the army. I joined the army to get away from drugs. Big mistake, right? But there was we used to call him cannonball because he was real tall, had a big fat round head. But this guy, he would deliberately go out and try to mentor the guys under him. Great guy. He would say things like, "Never go out with less than 50 bucks in your pocket." I mean, he would say that kind of manly advice, you know, but he was just such a great guy, but all the and I would I would uh choose mentors without even knowing it. Father images and he was just one. There are a lot of other people, other men that I did that with that were not good, that led me into darker places. And fatherless kids are doing that, right? Fatherless kids, they don’t even know they’re doing it, but they’re looking at men as their models replacing the fathers that they don’t have or the fathers that are not present. Just want you to know that. Right. increased crime and incarceration rates amongst children who are fatherless in the prison. Overwhelmingly, the people that are incarcerated, particularly the men, are fatherless, and they’re the ones that get sucked in to all that crime, drugs, looking for a purpose, significance, and identity and creating it on their own. You know, the in the men’s prison, there’s 2,000 men incarcerated right now. 2,000. There’s a hundred women. Okay? And most of those women, their crimes are usually connected to the guys that they’re in a relationship with. You know, selling drugs, prostitution, whatever it is. Overwhelmingly, men without fathers are more likely to commit crimes. There’s greater instability in fatherless homes and it affects neighborhoods and communities. Particularly for men, there’s a pressure to prove yourself as a man. There’s a fear of failure because of what other people will think of you. Difficulty expressing emotion. confusion about masculinity, isolation, and no sense of belonging, and underdeveloped conflict resolution skills, right? All that comes from dad. And for women, there’s a longing for attention, difficulty trusting men, vulnerability to unhealthy relationships, struggles with self-worth, and a tendency to overattach. A father abs a father's absence leaves wounds that show up through adulthood. Father wounds can make children of absent fathers feel hopeless and broken throughout adult lives. The consequences of fatherhood or fatherlessness is real. It's real and it's devastating. But God, >> but God, >> our God is a father to the fatherless. >> Sing to God. >> Sing praise of his name. Extol him who rides on the clouds. Rejoice before him. His name is the Lord, a father to the fatherless, a defender of widows. is our God. >> He sets the lonely in families. This is our God. He doesn't leave us fartherless. All of you who have those farther wounds, our father is your father. >> He loves you. He loves you and he's inviting you in to be his sons and daughters. How is God a father to the fatherless? He steps into the empty spaces left by absent fathers. He brings stability to the lives that are drifting for a lack of a family foundation. He speaks identity to those who are trapped in the lies that they're not good enough, that they're not loved, that they'’re not secure and not chosen. See what great love the father has lavished on us that we should be called the children of God because that's what we are, writes first John 3:1. >> Hallelujah. He creates belonging where there was loneliness and isolation, adopting us and placing us in a community and a forever family. God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ, writes Paul in Ephesians 1:5. He heals our wounds of rejection, abandonment, harshness, silence, and abuse by his power, his unconditional love, and his promise to never leave us or forsake us. Psalmist writes, "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds." In Romans, Paul writes, "The spirit you receive does not make you slaves so that you live in fear again. Rather, the spirit you received brought about your adoption, your sunship. And in him we cry, "Aba, Father." >> Yes. >> He protects and defends us as a refuge and a shield and a rock of our salvation, sending the Holy Spirit to dwell with us forever. Psalmist writes, "Even though my father and mother abandoned me, the Lord will hold me close." From Psalm 27:10. And he restores us by faith. He restores us by faith. Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God, writes John. How do you live? How do you live as a loved child of God? How does God become your father? To receive the father, you have to receive the son. >> Come on. Hallelujah. >> You want God as your father. You want to see God. Jesus said, "If you've seen me, you've seen the father." >> The way you receive the father is to receive the son. And all you have to do is invite him in. Invite him into your life today and he will heal the wounds of your heart. >> The way you receive him is just to say, "Father, I want to come home to you. I recognize that I've sinned and left you, but you your heart says return to me and I will return to you. Your son died for my sake and I receive that sacrifice on my behalf and I want to walk with you the rest of my life. Do that today and he becomes your father. You become his son. You are adopted into his family. It’s that easy. Then trust in his provision that he will give you everything you need to walk with him for the rest of your life. There's nothing that you will lack in the family of God. Let him speak identity into you. Replace the earthly father's distortions with the heavenly father's truth about who you really are. Allow him to heal your wounds by spending time in his word and let scripture speak his voice to you. Join a life group. You want to know who you are? Look at the people around you and let them speak God's truth into your life. Don't be isolated any longer. Be part of a family. Our family. Reflect his heart to others. Start sharing your story about your relationship with your good father. Your testimony can be somebody else's breakthrough. Build spiritual rhythms. Worship, prayer, fellowship, scripture reading, repentance, generosity, and service. Live a new way. Break those old cycles of depression. and loneliness and isolation. Live as a loved child. Make decisions based on who he says you are, not on how you are wounded. >> And treat others with his compassion. We are going to be fathering a next generation. Don't let your past rule you any longer. You are a new creation in him. You have a new father, a new life. Go out and be that new life. >> Yes. Yes. No. Our God is great. Our God is good. Are there any fathers here today that are fathering through their own father wounds? Are there fathers here today that were absent that feel like they've failed that want to restore their families? Are there wounded sons and daughters here today that need healing and recovery? Jesus says, "Come to me all who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon me or upon you and learn from me for I am gentle and humble of heart and you will find rest for your souls. Mark has been talking about rest, not work rest. Peace and soul rest only comes from Jesus. If you want to be rebuilt as a dad like I was. If you want to be restored as a son or a daughter, come to him. We'll have the prayer team at the altar here after worship. Come and be restored. Let's pray. Father, I pray rest and restoration for all our fathers here. Stepfathers, adopted fathers, grandfathers, spiritual fathers, fathers to be mentors on this day and every day for your glory and for the sake of your people. for the fatherless among us. Remind them today that they are not fatherless as your children as part of your church. They are father loved, father seen, father pursued and father held. Father, we love you. You are abba. In the name of your son Jesus, we pray. Amen.
YOUTUBE DESCRIPTION: Father's Day stirs powerful emotions for many; joyful memories for those who experienced healthy fathers, and anxiety for others who experienced absent or distant ones. Pastor Bill talks about how our God is a Father to all, and a Father to the fatherless.